Finally I’m back to the stressful day to day activities by NYSC. Not to worry, you will all get to read about my NYSC camp experience very soon. Flashback(as we have in those yoruba movies where you have numerous flashbacks in one particular flashback) to my undergraduate days on OAU campus (kampuss in jenifa’s voice)…A typical monday plays out like this:
Alarm rings at 5am for 7am class, annoyingly gets up cursing and hissing as if I’m on mount Ebal(the mountain God told the Isrealites to set aside for curses). Despite my sleepy eyes, i can still tell the direction of the kitchen (hunger must not flog man pikin).
After setting the food on fire, i move to the bathroom for cleansing (Iwe mimo)..Opens the tap, no water…What the Heck!!!..On a monday morning..Alas, our ‘fire-emitting, tongue-twisting, headache-giving matron’ didn’t pump water..In her own words “Regular pumping of water will spoil the pumping machine”…You say what!!!. What is the actual use of the pumping machine.
Y’all should have seen me casting and binding on those demoralizing monday mornings..
With all annoyance, I banged on her door. As they say, two wrongs can’t make things right. With the last ounce of respect i had left, i explained to her. Thankfully, i had my bath not long after and dressed up for class.
Suddenly, it struck me, MY BREAKFAST. A rush of adrenaline swept through my bones, I literally disappeared and reappeared in the kitchen(Teleport). Luckily for me, i was able to salvage little.
Angry, Sad and discouraged, i walked to campus gate only to meet a long queue of students waiting for buses to conveye them to students union busstop(SUB)..With tears in my eyes, i became the koko master himself “Why me, Lord?”.
After so much struggle and hustle, i boarded a bus to SUB.
To further hone my cursing skills, on getting to my department 7am prompt, the lecturer was said to have called the class representative to cancel the 7am class. I’m sure you know the end aiidy.
The only thing i can say is that the lecturer fell ill the following day. My hands are clean ooo