The Vaccine Nation: The Unveiling Drama

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Right now in Nigeria, the fear of vaccination is the beginning of wisdom. Since last week, the internet has been going crazy about the ongoing rumour of the administration of vaccines to school children by military operatives in the East. The vaccines are said to cause monkey pox in their recipients. Several pictures of caring mothers and loving fathers taking desperate measures to withdraw their wards from various schools are making rounds on the internet. It was told of a policeman who personally went to pick his child from school. The Nigerian populace have zero trust in its government. What a sorry case!!

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While we thought that was the end of the rumour, the same incident reared its ugly head in the Sunshine state (Ondo State). Parents on Tuesday stormed many public and private primary schools, as well as secondary schools in Ondo State to withdraw their children. I was amazed and shocked at the extent parents could go for their children. Parents invited thugs to shoot at school gates so as to reach out to their wards. Pandemonium broke out, School gates were dismantled, Schools became disorganised, transport fares increased. Parents ran faster than Usain Bolt. Parents became world heavyweight champions.
Several Parents were heard saying statements such as:
“Wetin government do on top bring back our girls matter”
“Who naija epp”
“Naija case na me and my family”

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Here is my one kobo take on the matter: I believe this is a ploy by some heartless persons to turn the people against the military. Federal Government should address this issue before it gets to the critical stage. Media houses should take turns in educating the entire public on vaccination as well as the procedures of carrying out vaccination and its channels. School management should also assist in educating and informing parents through organised PTA meetings.
I believe with adequate education, information and effective communication channels, baseless rumours such as this will have absolutely zero effect on the nation at large.

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A Date to Remember

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Lot of times when my girlfriends come visiting,we often end up talking about guys and this includes their various experiences as well as outings with guys. Both the good,bad,ugly, boring and funny ones. There are some to gosh about and some to laugh about.
Being the indoor type, I was chatting with Bestie one hot afternoon..Amebos….well you can say that again..Sooner than later,hunger beckoned. We stood up to get something to eat when out of the blue we heard a knock on the door. We were a bit surprised because we weren’t expecting anyone. Anyways,I tiptoed to the door(being the more “ameboish” one) and looked tthrough the peep hole. Lo and behold it was one of bestie’s never relenting “toasters”. I carefully walked back to the room to inform her. She was fuming as she moved towards the door(A hungry babe is an angry one).
All na wash sha. She ushered in the gentle bobo with a fake smile.I greeted the well dressed guy and moved to my room. He looked like someone going to see his in-laws for the first time.
His new and neatly ironed shirt whose edges were as sharp as the tip of a knife, his polished shoes which were radiating, well combed hair, good fragrance perfume were indicators of this. I smiled sheepishly as I moved to my room.
Not long after Bestie came in to give me the good news. Although it wasn’t the gospel of Christ. The gentle bobo had offered to take her out. I couldn’t help but laugh. I had noticed the signals initially.

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Back to the matter, she got dressed. I offered her my one kobo advice.I said ‘Dress simple, it’s hot’. Thankfully she listened and wore a knitted sleeveless blouse(made by her very self) with jean trousers and a matching pair of borrow pose slippers. After which she applied makeup. I constantly reminded her of her purse. Yessoo ladies never go on a date without taking little cash along or better still your ATM card(well,that’s if your account hasn’t been washed with the blood sha). All set,they took their leave.

Tick, Tack.Tick, Tack. Tick, Tack.
Thirty minutes passed, one hour, one hour thirty minutes, two hours passed. Finally, I heard a knock to which I responded and Bestie walked in. I was beaming with smiles, I couldn’t wait to devour the gist. Without waiting for me to close the door,she screamed
“I’m hungryyyy!!!!”
I was speechless and motionless. Not caring about me, she moved to the kitchen and emptied two packs of noodles into the pot to boil. After a meal well eaten, she got down to the details of the outing.

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According to her tale of woes, our amiable gentleman gave the suggestion of going to his house to pick the car, to which she obliged. On getting there, he pleaded with her for few minutes to prepare the car( as if he was going to make semovita). Five minutes later,he walked in sweating profusely.
‘There has been a problem’ he said. To which she replied ‘what is it?’
‘The car isn’t ready’
‘Well,no problem I wasn’t really cool with the car idea. Let’s opt for a bike instead’
‘All right. Thanks’
On getting to the gate, he changed his mind and said the bike idea was a terrible one as he would prefer they stayed indoors. To cut the long story short, they ended up spending the afternoon in the comfort of his living room sipping cold milk with a dash of coffee.๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

ACT OF KINDNESS

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Happy Eid mubarak to my muslim friends and loved ones. Today being a public holiday, i decided to stroll around Lagos a bit. Although i wasn’t involved in the fasting, but i can help out with the meals. Am i FFO?

So, I boarded a bus to my supposed destination. Along the way, we got to a traffic light and obeyed the red signal. Then, i sighted a muslim man, he had a problem with one of his legs. He was obviously on his way to mosque. He didnt look like the rich or comfortable nigerian. Suddenly, he saw a lame beggar ahead of him and gave alms unto the man and went his way.

Something struck me. If a one-legged man can still remember to give to a lame person out of the little he had, how much more a healthy human being. This act of kindness was done as a way of giving thanks unto the Almighty God.

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To all my muslim friends on this remarkable day, even out of the little you have, there is still so much more to give. Remember your situation isn’t the worst there is. GIVE FREELY AND WHOLEHEARTEDLY !!!

My NYSC Experience pt II

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Finally i was able to register the following day after being reminded of the bible verse that talks of the violent taking the kingdom of heaven by force. My kits(Khaki, jungle boots, white shorts and white round neck tops) were as usual oversize. Infact they could fit ‘two of me’. Since the next day was swearing in, i was left with no choice than to slimfit the khaki material at an extremely high price(#1500). I was crying bitterly on the inside. As the woman was sewing the khaki, it felt as if my flesh was being sewn. Anyways it was only manageable for the swearing in ceremony with my jungle boot of all sizes.

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As for the swearing in ceremony, i was opportuned to listen from the health center because i was assisted by the red cross personnels from the parade ground to the clinic. Y’all understand. And Guess what i ended up crushing on one fine doctor. What a Blessing in Disguise! Please don’t judge me.
The following day SAED lectures commenced. The Era of everlasting sleep. Coman and see different sleeping positions. Chooiii no be mata of forming o. Even “bigger guys and ladies” slept recklessly after having one’s sweet morning sleep disturbed by the so called beagle.

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All in all, SAED class was fun and educative. I signed up for the Decoration and event management class. I met a crazy comedian-MC Holy Mouth aka Dem go collect. He is extremely talented. I no dey crush o, make una take am easy.

Not forgetting, the entertaining social events at night during which most times our sexy camp commandant (Cc Sexy) danced or rapped for us. 99.5% of the female corpers were tripping for “Cc sexy” and they did all sorts to get his attention.
Finally, camp came to an end. What NYSC joined together, primary posting put asunder. But still friends were made, ties were knot, families were united and we departed to our various Ppas with joy.

N.B: To my two lovely NYSC besties turned destiny friends- Ayomikun and Fikayo, I love you dearly.

My Nysc Camp Experience part 1

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After many months of prayer and fasting. The good news finally arrived. I couldn’t sleep due to anxiety. Thankfully, Bestie and I were posted to south west. Ondo state to be precise(our exact choice)…Yayyy, i rolled on the ground severally immediately i saw it… The journey to camp was about six hours despite the fast and furious driver we had.

On getting to camp, my loads were searched for contrabands as they call it.Trust me(as per good citizen), none was found in my possession. In the process of the search, i forgot the small bucket(which i bought at a ridiculous price) at the security post. We were asked to go to our rooms to drop our loads(they were quite considerate). After this, registration began. Omo, see queue.
Well, well, being a Queen ๐Ÿ‘‘, a gentleman allowed me to stand before him and in no time, i was through with stage 1 with so much ease and comfort. Stage 1 involved screening of credentials.

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Moving on to stage 2(biometrics screening), a large crowd was sitted patiently in the so called multipurpose hall. The same gentleman offered me his seat. Trust me, i jumped at the offer without wasting time. Although, i had to give him my number, but trust me Lagos babe i know how to get guys(that i have no interest in) off my back. Hopefully he wouldn’t get to read this post.

Unfortunately i wasn’t opportuned to complete my registration after sitting at a spot from 2pm to 10pm. In addition, i ate a very cold plate of rice at mammy market at a high price. I purged all night and ended up pleading to Baba God to teleport me back to my Father’s house. An empty wish.
God bless Naija anyways!!!

The Struggle

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Finally I’m back to the stressful day to day activities by NYSC. Not to worry, you will all get to read about my NYSC camp experience very soon. Flashback(as we have in those yoruba movies where you have numerous flashbacks in one particular flashback) to my undergraduate days on OAU campus (kampuss in jenifa’s voice)…A typical monday plays out like this:
Alarm rings at 5am for 7am class, annoyingly gets up cursing and hissing as if I’m on mount Ebal(the mountain God told the Isrealites to set aside for curses). Despite my sleepy eyes, i can still tell the direction of the kitchen (hunger must not flog man pikin).
After setting the food on fire, i move to the bathroom for cleansing (Iwe mimo)..Opens the tap, no water…What the Heck!!!..On a monday morning..Alas, our ‘fire-emitting, tongue-twisting, headache-giving matron’ didn’t pump water..In her own words “Regular pumping of water will spoil the pumping machine”…You say what!!!. What is the actual use of the pumping machine.

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Y’all should have seen me casting and binding on those demoralizing monday mornings..
With all annoyance, I banged on her door. As they say, two wrongs can’t make things right. With the last ounce of respect i had left, i explained to her. Thankfully, i had my bath not long after and dressed up for class.
Suddenly, it struck me, MY BREAKFAST. A rush of adrenaline swept through my bones, I literally disappeared and reappeared in the kitchen(Teleport). Luckily for me, i was able to salvage little.
Angry, Sad and discouraged, i walked to campus gate only to meet a long queue of students waiting for buses to conveye them to students union busstop(SUB)..With tears in my eyes, i became the koko master himself “Why me, Lord?”.

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After so much struggle and hustle, i boarded a bus to SUB.
To further hone my cursing skills, on getting to my department 7am prompt, the lecturer was said to have called the class representative to cancel the 7am class. I’m sure you know the end aiidy.
The only thing i can say is that the lecturer fell ill the following day. My hands are clean ooo

The Unending Preacher Man

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Finally I’m back to the city of Lagos. I love travelling especially on sundays…that traffic-free highway feeling.
My lazy ass refused to go to church. I didn’t know God had secretly meted out my deserved punishment to me.

As usual, i boarded a bus from Oau campus gate(as i have been doing for the past uncountable years now). Without wasting my precious time, the bus was filled and the three hours journey began.
Within five of the journey, a man (directly behind me) said words of prayer to which everyone chroused ‘Amen’. We all thought that was going to be end,since this was the usual practice.

After the prayer session, the man further went on to imploy passengers to praise God and he said a statement i hate to reckon with “Let’s be in the mood of worship”. What!! Why else was i created? I was made to worship him. That’s who i am. Well, I’m starting to sound like a preacher myself. So, i quietly let that statement slid(as if i had a choice, sef). After about twenty minutes, the worship and praise session ended. I breathed a sigh of relief and silently munched the words “Thank you Father”.

Suddenly, i heard the voice like the sound of a mighty rushing wind. Lo and behold, it was our “Daddy in the Lord” preaching. Holy mother of mary!!! What I do? “Father, please let this cup pass over me…I repent of all my sins..i promise to always keep the Sabbath day holy” Nevertheless, God’s will had to be done.

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The preaching continued alongside the journey. Thirty minutes passed…One hour went by, our ‘Daddy G.O’ was now in the spirit. He kept speaking the words endlessly and passionately with adorning bible verses…
Not long after, i developed headache not because of the unceasing preaching but because of the pitch and Timbre of his voice. Even the wife of our Daddy G.O was fast asleep.

Finally brethren, after an hour and thirty minutes, the conclusion of the church session was said and we said the grace literally. I felt like jumping. I could see the host of heaven congratulating me as I finished the race in good faith.

ZZZ -Zzzz-ZZzzz – hngGGggh -Ppbhww – zZZzzzZZ”
I turned around and behold Daddy G.O was fast asleep๐Ÿ˜ด and sonorously snoring….Truly, he is a witness of Christ even to the uttermost part of the earth๐ŸŒ. I jejely inserted my earpiece into my ears. God be praised!!!