ACT OF KINDNESS

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Happy Eid mubarak to my muslim friends and loved ones. Today being a public holiday, i decided to stroll around Lagos a bit. Although i wasn’t involved in the fasting, but i can help out with the meals. Am i FFO?

So, I boarded a bus to my supposed destination. Along the way, we got to a traffic light and obeyed the red signal. Then, i sighted a muslim man, he had a problem with one of his legs. He was obviously on his way to mosque. He didnt look like the rich or comfortable nigerian. Suddenly, he saw a lame beggar ahead of him and gave alms unto the man and went his way.

Something struck me. If a one-legged man can still remember to give to a lame person out of the little he had, how much more a healthy human being. This act of kindness was done as a way of giving thanks unto the Almighty God.

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To all my muslim friends on this remarkable day, even out of the little you have, there is still so much more to give. Remember your situation isn’t the worst there is. GIVE FREELY AND WHOLEHEARTEDLY !!!

My NYSC Experience pt II

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Finally i was able to register the following day after being reminded of the bible verse that talks of the violent taking the kingdom of heaven by force. My kits(Khaki, jungle boots, white shorts and white round neck tops) were as usual oversize. Infact they could fit ‘two of me’. Since the next day was swearing in, i was left with no choice than to slimfit the khaki material at an extremely high price(#1500). I was crying bitterly on the inside. As the woman was sewing the khaki, it felt as if my flesh was being sewn. Anyways it was only manageable for the swearing in ceremony with my jungle boot of all sizes.

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As for the swearing in ceremony, i was opportuned to listen from the health center because i was assisted by the red cross personnels from the parade ground to the clinic. Y’all understand. And Guess what i ended up crushing on one fine doctor. What a Blessing in Disguise! Please don’t judge me.
The following day SAED lectures commenced. The Era of everlasting sleep. Coman and see different sleeping positions. Chooiii no be mata of forming o. Even “bigger guys and ladies” slept recklessly after having one’s sweet morning sleep disturbed by the so called beagle.

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All in all, SAED class was fun and educative. I signed up for the Decoration and event management class. I met a crazy comedian-MC Holy Mouth aka Dem go collect. He is extremely talented. I no dey crush o, make una take am easy.

Not forgetting, the entertaining social events at night during which most times our sexy camp commandant (Cc Sexy) danced or rapped for us. 99.5% of the female corpers were tripping for “Cc sexy” and they did all sorts to get his attention.
Finally, camp came to an end. What NYSC joined together, primary posting put asunder. But still friends were made, ties were knot, families were united and we departed to our various Ppas with joy.

N.B: To my two lovely NYSC besties turned destiny friends- Ayomikun and Fikayo, I love you dearly.

My Nysc Camp Experience part 1

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After many months of prayer and fasting. The good news finally arrived. I couldn’t sleep due to anxiety. Thankfully, Bestie and I were posted to south west. Ondo state to be precise(our exact choice)…Yayyy, i rolled on the ground severally immediately i saw it… The journey to camp was about six hours despite the fast and furious driver we had.

On getting to camp, my loads were searched for contrabands as they call it.Trust me(as per good citizen), none was found in my possession. In the process of the search, i forgot the small bucket(which i bought at a ridiculous price) at the security post. We were asked to go to our rooms to drop our loads(they were quite considerate). After this, registration began. Omo, see queue.
Well, well, being a Queen πŸ‘‘, a gentleman allowed me to stand before him and in no time, i was through with stage 1 with so much ease and comfort. Stage 1 involved screening of credentials.

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Moving on to stage 2(biometrics screening), a large crowd was sitted patiently in the so called multipurpose hall. The same gentleman offered me his seat. Trust me, i jumped at the offer without wasting time. Although, i had to give him my number, but trust me Lagos babe i know how to get guys(that i have no interest in) off my back. Hopefully he wouldn’t get to read this post.

Unfortunately i wasn’t opportuned to complete my registration after sitting at a spot from 2pm to 10pm. In addition, i ate a very cold plate of rice at mammy market at a high price. I purged all night and ended up pleading to Baba God to teleport me back to my Father’s house. An empty wish.
God bless Naija anyways!!!

The Struggle

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Finally I’m back to the stressful day to day activities by NYSC. Not to worry, you will all get to read about my NYSC camp experience very soon. Flashback(as we have in those yoruba movies where you have numerous flashbacks in one particular flashback) to my undergraduate days on OAU campus (kampuss in jenifa’s voice)…A typical monday plays out like this:
Alarm rings at 5am for 7am class, annoyingly gets up cursing and hissing as if I’m on mount Ebal(the mountain God told the Isrealites to set aside for curses). Despite my sleepy eyes, i can still tell the direction of the kitchen (hunger must not flog man pikin).
After setting the food on fire, i move to the bathroom for cleansing (Iwe mimo)..Opens the tap, no water…What the Heck!!!..On a monday morning..Alas, our ‘fire-emitting, tongue-twisting, headache-giving matron’ didn’t pump water..In her own words “Regular pumping of water will spoil the pumping machine”…You say what!!!. What is the actual use of the pumping machine.

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Y’all should have seen me casting and binding on those demoralizing monday mornings..
With all annoyance, I banged on her door. As they say, two wrongs can’t make things right. With the last ounce of respect i had left, i explained to her. Thankfully, i had my bath not long after and dressed up for class.
Suddenly, it struck me, MY BREAKFAST. A rush of adrenaline swept through my bones, I literally disappeared and reappeared in the kitchen(Teleport). Luckily for me, i was able to salvage little.
Angry, Sad and discouraged, i walked to campus gate only to meet a long queue of students waiting for buses to conveye them to students union busstop(SUB)..With tears in my eyes, i became the koko master himself “Why me, Lord?”.

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After so much struggle and hustle, i boarded a bus to SUB.
To further hone my cursing skills, on getting to my department 7am prompt, the lecturer was said to have called the class representative to cancel the 7am class. I’m sure you know the end aiidy.
The only thing i can say is that the lecturer fell ill the following day. My hands are clean ooo

The Unending Preacher Man

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Finally I’m back to the city of Lagos. I love travelling especially on sundays…that traffic-free highway feeling.
My lazy ass refused to go to church. I didn’t know God had secretly meted out my deserved punishment to me.

As usual, i boarded a bus from Oau campus gate(as i have been doing for the past uncountable years now). Without wasting my precious time, the bus was filled and the three hours journey began.
Within five of the journey, a man (directly behind me) said words of prayer to which everyone chroused ‘Amen’. We all thought that was going to be end,since this was the usual practice.

After the prayer session, the man further went on to imploy passengers to praise God and he said a statement i hate to reckon with “Let’s be in the mood of worship”. What!! Why else was i created? I was made to worship him. That’s who i am. Well, I’m starting to sound like a preacher myself. So, i quietly let that statement slid(as if i had a choice, sef). After about twenty minutes, the worship and praise session ended. I breathed a sigh of relief and silently munched the words “Thank you Father”.

Suddenly, i heard the voice like the sound of a mighty rushing wind. Lo and behold, it was our “Daddy in the Lord” preaching. Holy mother of mary!!! What I do? “Father, please let this cup pass over me…I repent of all my sins..i promise to always keep the Sabbath day holy” Nevertheless, God’s will had to be done.

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The preaching continued alongside the journey. Thirty minutes passed…One hour went by, our ‘Daddy G.O’ was now in the spirit. He kept speaking the words endlessly and passionately with adorning bible verses…
Not long after, i developed headache not because of the unceasing preaching but because of the pitch and Timbre of his voice. Even the wife of our Daddy G.O was fast asleep.

Finally brethren, after an hour and thirty minutes, the conclusion of the church session was said and we said the grace literally. I felt like jumping. I could see the host of heaven congratulating me as I finished the race in good faith.

ZZZ -Zzzz-ZZzzz – hngGGggh -Ppbhww – zZZzzzZZ”
I turned around and behold Daddy G.O was fast asleep😴 and sonorously snoring….Truly, he is a witness of Christ even to the uttermost part of the earth🌍. I jejely inserted my earpiece into my ears. God be praised!!!

Happy 25th Wedding Anniversary to my Parents

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Yayyyyyy…. My parents celebrated their silver jubilee wedding anniversary last week. So sorry i’m just letting y’all know, I am not the “Megaphone” type. Don’t expect pictures either o.

Five quick facts about them:
1. Their nicknames are Tom and Jerry (they pray, laugh, eat, and yess…. fight together). These nicknames were given to them by my big brother.
2. They both love God crazily (that’s why I’m still this sane….Una sabi sef)
3. They are each other’s aproko partner(chooiii….they can gossip for Africa, even upto the extent of being late for work).
4. They are both last borns(Maybe that’s why they are so compatible…abeg me sef dey find any single guy wey be lastborn o)
5. They are both using the same phone model (the only difference is that Mum’s phone is gold in colour, while that of Dad is black).

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So to the womb that bore Tee(My one and only brother) & I and the hands that nurtured us:

“25 years is a long time. And I thank God that He has kept you both through thick and thin even as you help each other achieve your goals. Your shared laughter, your shared companionship and love, even shared fights never ceases to amaze me. I pray that your union and love for each other grows stronger, bigger and wider. May you never cherish memories of the past. Rather, you will have bigger, happier and more glorious days ahead. Your love for each other has made my life and  that of my brother happy and bright. I pray that as you have groomed us and made us blossom, may you live tremendously long to enjoy  the fruits of our enlargement and expansion. HAPPY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY”

Tee & I love you to the moon πŸŒ™ and back.😘😘😘

Help!!!! I Need Your Advice

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Currently posting this story from a bike seat. Endurance, they say, is the key. A quick rewind to how it all started.

So, i went out today to get some minor things. On my way back, at the busstop, i did a quick survey of the bike men properly in order to avoid being thrown like a javelin into the bush by bike men that are in the upper room speaking in other tongues as a result of alcohol and cigarettes. Thankfully i sighted an old bikeman who looked sane but eventually turned out not to be. We agreed on the fare and took off.

Zoom…… Zoom…. Zoom
We got to the street opposite my house gate. Only for this sane looking but mentally insane man to drop me directly on the road that divides my house from the next street despite the fact that the gate was wide open..All, he had to do was drive into the compound. My blood boiled.

Trust me to escort him to the point of being dragged in the mud. I respectfully told him to drive into the compound, this old man declined and started throwing insultive words at me..With all Joy and fulfilment, I removed his ignition key and sat confidently on the bike without uttering a word. Ever since he has been screaming his guts out while i am busy blogging.

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But i have a very minor issue and i need your advice. A heavy truck seems to be coming towards our direction, should i alight from the bike or stay and fight for my right like our Mummy Oby Ezekwesili?